On Board, I'm The Captain.

ivegottobethere:

ima-ho-ho-ho:

rneerkat:

snapfox:

rneerkat:

rneerkat:

what happens to nitrogen when the sun rises

it becomes daytrogen

I’m going to bed.

good nitrogen

sleep tightrogen

don’t let the bed bugs bitrogen

lord-of-the-inferno:

"Alright Levi, what colour are you going to be now?"

"WOW COOL THE SAME COLOUR GOOD JOB IDIOT."

Apparently Hello Kitty is not a cat :0

I’m gonna retype this post I just told Taylor’s friend Rena because I’m hilarious ready

So I was walking down the road the other day and I saw a snail. I said “What’re you doing on the road?” and the snail replied “About three meters per hour.”

hypeangel:

Yes?

hypeangel:

Yes?

burningbrighterstill:

on the way home after concerts with your friend like 

image

gyarados:

guard-me-gamora:

gyarados:

Literally kill all Republicans and Jesus freaks

Dude. No. Don’t kill anybody. Bad. That’s murder. Turn them into dragons or something.

do you really want racist homophobic dragons flying around

reading the uesp like

asexualfactoftheday:

[#509. Grey-aromantic Asexuals have an impeccable fashion sense.]

asexualfactoftheday:

[#509. Grey-aromantic Asexuals have an impeccable fashion sense.]

hyperscraps:

iamaslumberbatch:

a-lot-like-diana:

so basically when you have your period and your lower back hurts it is because your hips are contracting and spreading apart, only slightly, to make room for the release of the blood and linings of your uterus. so basically your body is going through a small and mild labor to push out the dead insides of your uterus. so basically I have gone through labor and basically I don’t want children. 

why aren’t we taught this shit

wow how about no

terrorechoes:

having the worst internet connection in your friend group

image

lucyliuism:

g0thamsreckoning:

oh my gOD 

i hAVE BEEN LAUGHING AT THIS FOR 29834798234 YEARS

lucyliuism:

g0thamsreckoning:

oh my gOD 

i hAVE BEEN LAUGHING AT THIS FOR 29834798234 YEARS

theshoutingendoflife:

jaclcfrost:

standing next to sunflowers always makes me feel weak like “look at this fucking flower. this flower is taller than i am. this flower is winning and i’m losing”

Wow you are not ready to hear about trees.